01/11 Break-ups are a very subjective part of human life
We humans are bound to be together with someone which creates a sense of love, attachment, dependency, and making memories in short, the person becomes part of their every day-to-day life. It builds our emotions of strength, care, love, support, person to whom we can talk about anything and everything.
A person starts becoming vulnerable unconsciously with their partner and ready to give everything with their whole mind and soul. Unfortunately, in this process, if something strikes like a misconception, misunderstanding, infidelity, wrong beliefs, mismatched companionship, etc which might make a partner's false perception taking their partner into account, a person's emotions which were developed in this process fall apart suddenly and they are left with no clue about what to do? where to go? whom to talk to? In short, this creates a sense of loneliness, sadness, disappointments, low self-esteem, regrets, etc, and the emotions that we bound up with the person start haunting us.
02/11 You start losing your identity
Negative emotions start overpowering and you start becoming a person you are not. But let’s be a bit mindful about life, that life never ends here it’s our mindset that needs to be reset. Life is a journey where people will come and go. We can be mindful of it by giving a thought that this phase you went through must have happened to give you lessons, new learnings and to become more wiser person. Maybe you deserve something better, maybe that person has this much role to play with you in this life journey.
Our mind is full of negative thoughts, (self) doubts, and overthinking and at this point, we need to take care of ourselves. We have to develop the mental strength to deal with and face things when we are at our worst in terms of mental health. Here are the ways to come out of it:
03/11 Cut contact
The first step to get over any breakup is to cut off all contact with your ex-partner. Going no-contact will be difficult at first, but it is the only way to start living a new life that doesn't include your ex.
04/11 Eliminate reminders
Anything that reminds you of your ex should be donated, thrown out, or hidden away until such time as you are ready to see them again. This could include gifts they bought you, items you bought together, pictures, and love letters.
It is also a good idea to delete your ex from social media so you don't accidentally see any reminders while scrolling through your news feeds. Then, make sure to go through your phone and delete any photos you have there as well.
05/11 Stay healthy
The best gift you can give yourself after a hard breakup is to make your health a priority. It's common to want to eat only junk food after a breakup, or worse, to stop eating entirely. But both choices cause your energy levels to plummet, which will only make you feel worse.
Eating nutritious meals and exercising regularly will help you to feel refreshed and strong, both physically and mentally. You should also keep your mind healthy and unclouded by limiting drug and alcohol intake and by getting enough sleep.
06/11 Keep busy
Too much idle time could let your mind wander towards thoughts of your broken relationship, so fill your time with positive activities like visiting friends or volunteering. Distractions will help to lift your mood and show you that life can still go on without your ex.
07/11 Let it out
Ending a relationship causes a significant emotional reaction that cannot be ignored. Bottling up your feelings only leads to increased pain and frustration, which will delay your recovery. Instead, vent about your breakup to a trusted group of friends, or write about it if sharing out loud is too difficult.
08/11 Avoid rebounds
You'll be lonely after a breakup, but don't let the fear of being alone cause you to jump right into another relationship. A relationship that begins before you have fully healed from your last one is doomed to fail, causing unnecessary pain for both yourself and your rebound partner.
An important part of breakup recovery is learning about yourself. If you instantly attach yourself to a new partner, you will rob yourself of the chance to discover who you are outside of a couple.
09/11 Pamper yourself
Your self-esteem takes a hit when going through a breakup, so practicing self-care is very important. Pamper yourself by watching a TV show you like, by eating a favourite meal, or by buying yourself a small treat.
Also, don't underestimate the power of positive thinking. Learn to end each day by reflecting on at least one good thing that happened. That way, you'll always go to sleep with a good attitude.
10/11 Give it time
Unfortunately, the only real way to get past a bad breakup is to give yourself time to heal. It could take weeks or months to start feeling back to normal, so don't expect too much too fast.
11/11 Look forward
The life you thought you'd have with your partner is over, and though it may be scary, it is a fact that you have to accept. The sooner you start envisioning your solo future, the sooner you will begin to truly move forward.
Having your heart broken is an experience that no one ever wants to go through. But when it happens, it is important to take control of the negative feelings before they dominate your life.
(Author: Dr Ishina Choudhary, Mental Health Therapist, Counselling Psychologist, Founder: Insight Alchemy)